Ancient Libraries Open for Those Who Bow with Reverence and Respect.
Artifakt Supply, Worcester, MA (November 2021)
And a humble mind achieves states of youthful awe, as the student within realizes, “The more I learn, the less I know.”
Western education was a start. I learned that I can rely on myself to create a fortress in which study & discipline become synonymous. This unbridled embrace of studentship has imprinted within me beginner’s mindset. With each step, my bandwidth opens to perceive the avatar of my next teacher.
Among my most intense teachers, pain has taught me how to turn my gaze within. To activate the intelligence stored within my DNA. Who knows my body better than the programmer itself? The master healer within who feels pain but does not suffer, remembering that pain is a natural and inevitable experience along our human journeys. Pain contains the code.
This path of the young Padawan within, illuminated by intuition as each cosmic breadcrumb whispered, “this way,” led to some soul-recalibrating bows at the lotus feet. I learned from the most revered Jedi Yogi masters in the region who taught me how identify and heal any disturbance in the Prana.
The library of Yoga, so vast and infinite, humbled me to my core as I watched it heal my spine after surgery. Learning from teachers who embodied the practice, each class became a direct transmission. My cells remembered and recrystallized to match the frequencies of the wisdom. Ancient healing wisdom.
This deep dive into Eastern schools prepared me for my next teachers. Plant medicine explorations facilitated by trusted Shamans. Metrowest and the 8 Limb Path prepared me so well in fact, I busted out my yoga flow in the middle of my first Ayahuasca journey beside my dear friend in the middle of the Peruvian jungle. Our Shaman in that moment taught me the art of holding space, allowing me to continue my Pranayama breathing without influencing my friend’s experience with the medicine.
Tarapoto, Peru (July 2018)
The art of holding space stayed with me as I held a cacao pod up to the sky and looked forward to my next teacher: Community. When my studentship cup began to overflow with knowledge, I returned from South America hearing the call to share. While our generation was raised on mantras of “sharing is caring,” and “knowledge is power,” the message doesn’t really land until we get a feel for the impact of that knowledge. The knowledge of healing arts leaves an inspiring impression.
Motivated by our ability to heal the root causes of suffering, I launched a free weekly offering at a community gathering space in Boston’s Chinatown neighborhood. I called it “Wellness Wednesday,” and drove each week from Worcester to Boston to share the practice of yoga and speak of the Dharma. Detaching from any expectations or end results, I simply listened to cosmic instruction to share what I had just received through Metrowest’s teacher training.
Community taught me to “trust in the show-up,” as my partner and I like to say. To us, this means that showing up to a space with gifts to share, knowledge to spread, and loving kindness to offer is enough. Even if we are the only people showing up to our workshops, we trust in the ripple we are creating. By showing up, we are anchoring a teaching into a space, even if it takes years for community to materialize around it.
Yoga at the Creative Zone in Boston, MA (August 2019)
When the lockdowns of 2020 forced communities to shelter in place, I returned to my tether. My stillness amid the noise and haste: Studentship. I enrolled in the Sounds True Mindfulness Meditation Teacher Certification Program and began my studies with Jack Kornfield and Tara Brach. Throughout this two-year curriculum, I also had the opportunity to work closely with my mentor, Joshua Bee Alafia. I chose Joshua from the Sounds True list of about 100 qualified mentors. He stood out to me immediately, as I received a Claircognizant indication that he was the one. He would be the mentor to prepare me for crossing the threshold into an unfamiliar new world. Actually, we have him to thank for the bell I ring to bring us back into our bodies to close out a meditation or yoga practice. He suggested, “Get a bell.” Simple yet life-changing guidance. We also have Joshua to thank for the introduction to my next teacher: Jesse Lee Parker, along with one final test before receiving the invitation into the world of Qi Gong.
Leading a virtual meditation for Bountiful Farms Dispensary (December 2021)
A test of my ability to purify my interpretations. Fortunately, I became intimately familiar with the power of our interpretations through iPEC’s Certified Professional Coach training program, which I was also completing around this time. iPEC seems to crank out coaches who become masters of our interpretations, equipped with the knowledge that fear-based interpretations result in Catabolic Energy. And Catabolic Energy often prevents us from receiving the blessings attempting to reach us. While love-based interpretations result in Anabolic Energy, which becomes a magnet for all that’s meant to find us. An opportunity to study with Jesse Lee Parker found me thanks to my actively calibrating my interpretations to love.
The Story:
As part of our SoundsTrue MMTCP training, each peer group received Zoom sessions twice a month with the mentor of our choosing. So everyone from around the world who chose Joshua met not only to receive Joshua’s wisdom, but to deepen our connection as a peer group and support one another through the vigorous curriculum as well. During one particularly activating Zoom call, I felt a cosmic nudge when towards the end of the session, Joshua asked, “Anything else?” I unmuted myself and asked, “How can I learn more?” My mentor then closed the Zoom room without any acknowledgement of my question. In the days that followed, it became clear to me that a gap in communication was widening, and I would be responsible for filling in all interpretations with love. Any time doubt would creep into my nervous system, I’d remind myself of all the Anabolic Options available: “He’s probably giving my question space to breathe,” “He’s going to respond all in divine timing,” “He trusts my ability to fill in all gaps in communication with love. His silence is a sign of respect.” I entertained the possibility of all these interpretations for about three to four months, knowing that if I were to doubt the process or allow fear & self-consciousness to creep in, the portal of trust and respect between my mentor and myself would close. One psilocybin-infused night around 10:30pm, after I had released all attachments, including any lingering desire to hear back about my question, I received my answer: A text from Joshua sharing he secured a scholarship for me to enroll in Qi Gong teacher training with his teacher, Jesse. The course would begin the following day. “You in?” He asked. Without hesitation, I answered, “I’m in.”
Qi Gong Demonstration in the living room, Worcester, MA (August 2022)
What a blessing this scholarship turned out to be. I’ve now been studying with Jesse for two-and-a-half years, and I feel I’m only at the beginning of learning this 10,000 year-old lineage. The more I learn, the more I see my own culture, the western collective, as young and naive, though pure of heart. Hungry for elders and ancient roots. As I prepare for my journey to Japan for in-person training with my teacher, I am beginning to feel the magnitude of this experience. I have been designated to receive these transmissions, integrate them, embody them, and root them back down in my homeland of North America, starting with my local community.
I have been granted permission to teach. To pass down a practice contained within this vast library that miraculously has been protected, even as its record-keepers are being persecuted to this very day. The scope of this honor brings me to my knees. Not only has my teacher given me the green light to share, it is also safe for me to share in our culture. I have held these cards close to my chest out of respect and reverence for all who given their lives to protect the Tao. For all who continue to practice, teach, and share despite the dangers, knowing the Immortal Arts never die. As one Avatar exits, another enters. I humbly accept my role as local Avatar for these living libraries, and I am excited to announce my first official offering:
Taoist Qi Gong & Longevity Breathwork
At Mati Yoga Studio
In Millbury, MA
Sunday, September 8, 6-8pm
Investment: $40
See https://www.matiyogastudio.com/workshops for the description.
I am also delighted to announce that upon my return from Japan, I will be opening the doors to my 1-on-1 mentorship offerings for Executives who would like to reduce stress and invite more ease into their lives. Many of you know me as a coach, though mentorship is much different. Choosing a mentor requires some level of clarity around where we’d like to go in life.
Typically, we gravitate towards mentors who are grounded, because we see them as capable and confident. Walking the footsteps of a body of knowledge or a practice to which we find ourselves attracted. We understand that however our mentors arrived at their current station in life was a process. One that required growth, change, and evolution. This process is a mystery.
When a mentor appears ungrounded, the knowledge itself is at risk of being transmitted in a hysterical or manic manner. This threatens the purpose of the knowledge itself, which is to be shared regeneratively. We may express our enthusiasm for certain topics all we like, though if one is turned off by the ungrounded nature of such expression, the information is blocked and rejected. A perceived lack of credibility is dangerous to the survival of important catalogues of knowledge. Continuity is made possible through rooted exchange.
A grounded mentor respects the gift of information and holds sacred the process of metabolizing such knowledge so that it becomes wisdom. A grounded mentor knows their role is to demystify the process.
When I think back on the investments I have made on myself since 2016, including a full circle return to Roger Williams University where I graduated from their MBA program through the Mario J. Gabelli School of Business in May 2024, I am astounded by the caliber of mentorship I've received. I feel prepared and sure-footed as my own path as a mentor for others is just getting started. With permission from my teachers I am honored to share my unique tapestry of knowledge. My synthesized collection of libraries with my mentees.
MBA Program Graduation, Bristol, RI (May 2024)
To prepare for this shift from student to teacher, I want to ensure that my Feedback Loop is pure and my channel is clear. Out of respect for the teachings I am about to share, and to create space for all the teachings I will receive in Japan, I have decided to join my Queen in the void and tap out of Instagram. See you on the other side.